In which I yell at a bald eagle, AND try to remember to breathe

It's amazing how getting busy can pull me away from the things I want to be doing. My original passion was writing, and it's a muscle that I don't get to exercise everyday. Much like my other muscles, now that I've gotten back in the habit, it's something I miss when I, well, miss it.

So today, I've got two blog posts in my head, that if I don't get out of my head now, I'm not sure when I will have time.

So my best workout in the last two weeks was a swim at Lake Washington on Saturday morning. Bright and early at Seward Park you can at least get a parking spot, but there is still a lot more activity, both people out running or riding or swimming, and this week, with the birds.

As my neighbor and I got ready to get in the water, we paused to watch a beautiful, adult bald eagle that was circling the cove where we swim. We next noticed a LOT of quacking each time he approached the water and realized what had his attention. There were two groups of ducks, of one adults, and another of a mother with her ducklings. It only took a split second to figure out that this was the circle of life at work. The eagle was planning a duckling breakfast.

I understand that this is the way that the world works. I am not a vegan or anything like that, but I admit, I get squeamish when it hits too close to home. (I got mad at the caterers at my wedding for leaving the head on the salmon in the buffet- I mean seriously, who wants to look their lunch in the eye?) I know the eagle was just doing what eagles do, but I simply couldn't watch.

After trying to ignore a couple more close calls, I couldn't just let it happen. So there I was, wet suit, swim cap, goggles on my head, waving my arms in the air and yelling at a bald eagle. I didn't actually threaten it, so I don't think I broke any laws about protected birds, I just told him to go away, and eat somewhere else. He circled one more time and took off. I didn't see if he had a duckling with him, but considering how quickly the ducks calmed, and that I didn't hear a duckling when he flew away, I think he just left. Hopefully he got himself a fish. I'm not really excited about swimming with them, even though I know it's their lake, not mine.

After that, the swim went fairly well. I'm still trying to stay slower, and not attack the water, so that I don't have to stop and catch my breath. I also picked up my brand new wetsuit of my very own, a Blue Seventy WLA. Considering the height & weight charts, I'm excited that it goes on, although it is tighter, and I have not yet been out in it.

This worries me a little, the lack of time that I've been training for the last 2.5 weeks, because SATURDAY is my first big event. It's in Portland, the Tri-It at the All Women's Tri/Du at Blue Lake, just east of Portland.

So here are the reasons that I'm hyperventilating:

1. In case you haven't heard, we're having a little bit of a heat wave here. It's supposed to break on Friday, but weather and supposed to doesn't always mean it will happen here in the Pacific NW. There is a reason my friends Scott and Steve called their book about being weather guys "Somewhere, I Was Right."
2. I have not yet been for a swim in my new wetsuit. I'm planning to on Thursday, but I know of something that will keep me busy Thursday night at work, so I'm a little concerned about it not happening.
3. I got new tires on my bike this weekend. Road tires vs. off-road tires. I have not been out on them either.
4. Did I mention that this is MY VERY FIRST TRIATHLON EVER?
5. WTF WAS I THINKING TO GET IN TO THIS?

When I did the 3 day, it was the 1st year in Seattle, 2001. And it was the hottest day of the year. On the first afternoon, as I came over the crest of the last hill, I saw all of the local TV helicopters circling our camp for the night. After I called the newsroom where I worked at the time, I learned that people were pushing themselves too hard, and needing medical attention. I was not one of those people. I trained my ass off (literally- I lost 50 lbs) and when I was too hot, I sat down.

So now I'm trying to thing of songs to get stuck in my head. A mental soundtrack to help me SLOW DOWN. When I swim with my friend who goes slower, I have had "You Are Not Alone," by MJ, but I don't think that's really what I want. My usually lately has been Pink's, "So What," but that will keep my pace too fast.

My mantra for this week's race. Finish. I don't need to win anything. It's enough as long as I finish.

Weightlessness

So I did it. I've officially signed up for a couple of intermediate events. I'm in week two of my "time off" and although if I bent over backwards I might be able to get it in, it's just really difficult. And with as much work as I've got, not worth the work.

But Saturday I swam. I never believed I could look forward to something involving working out as much as our swim in Beaver Lake on Saturday morning. There were only a few people fishing when my friends and I got there, and since the last few days had been so warm, the only reason I needed the wetsuit was for confidence floating.

The lake was just placid, with just three swimmers to cut thru the water. I let myself relax and just swim, not worrying about how anyone else was doing (okay, to some extent- I ALWAYS worry about others, over active mom instincts, even before I became a mother) but I concentrated on not attacking the water, just relaxing and trying to keep an even pace.

My husband always says he wants to retire on a golf course. Which is a little silly to talk about since he'll have to teach for like 25 more years, but I digress. When I got home on Saturday, I told him that I want to live on a lake. There was a guy sitting out on his deck, drinking coffee and I think watching us swim, and all I could think was, wouldn't it be great to be able to walk out on my dock and dive in?

It was just a perfect morning, not feeling like I had anything to prove, just slicing through the water. The water doesn't care how much I weigh. The water doesn't make anything jiggle or bounce. I just glide.

So now, I have to see if I can find that place of glide while surrounded by a hundred or two of my closest brand new friends. Trial one, August 1, Troutdale, Oregon. We'll see how I do.

Getting it into gear- hopefully not neutral.

I'm feeling awful that it's been so long since I've updated, but life gets in the way. My son turned six, and possibly into the devil, not only hitting & kicking friends at his daycare, but telling me that if I "lose of of the extra chubby weight you'll be able to run faster." Thanks.

Of course, this is while the hubby is out of town. Does he travel for work often? Uh, no. Just this week. And next week. Unless I have a nervous breakdown.

So since I last blogged, I met a neighbor who is looking to do her first tri too, invited her to come swimming with our team, and met ANOTHER neighbor who swam with us. Pretty cool to meet some more people since we've lived here for 2.5 yrs. You can tell, we get out a lot. :)

I've also not worked out AT ALL since that Saturday swim. I of course blame my hubby being out of town, but I think it's also a lack of motivation. SO I've decided that I've spent 2 months training, and I'm ready to start taking this show on the road. I'm 99% sure that I'm signing up for the Portland All-Women's try a try (shorter swim) event on 8/1 and the Lake Sammamish tri on 8/29. It's also a 1/4 mile swim, so it gets me one step closer to my BIG event on Sept. 20.

Two other little baby steps forward in the last 10 days. I was surprised by how much water comes out of my rental men's 2XU suit when I take it off (AND how it's not that hard to get on & off) Saturday I went to Triumph Multisport to try on a ladies wetsuit- a Blue Seventy Reaction WXLA sleeveless suit. AND IT FIT! I won't be able to get it used, but I'm going to call them & have them order. I'm very excited, since I'm less likely to shrink out of this as soon.

Baby step #2- I actually miss working out. I was hoping to take breaks from work to fit it in and it hasn't happened. Or to take the little man to daycare and do 1st thing in the AM. I'm looking at that plan for tomorrow, but I also met the parent of a teenager who lives down the street... might look at having her hang out @ my house for an hour while I work out.

I don't enjoy the working out while I'm doing it, but I miss how I feel after. When I come back in the house, when I get off my bike, when I get out of the pool, I feel taller. I want to get that back. Got to check the lap times at the pool for tomorrow.

The Heart of the Matter

So what I SHOULD be doing right now is going to bed, but on nights when I work out, I tend to not be tired right away. What this means is I should likely workout in the AM, but this is hard to convince myself when the alarm goes off.

I'm trying to get myself psyched up to sign up for an additional "try a tri" event in the next couple of weeks. DH is about to be in Oly for a summer job (he's a teacher) for 2 wks, so it would take some feats of crazy organization to get my work outs in, but if I DON'T sign up, then I may not bother to work out. I know my laziness. We've hung out for years... we're good friends.

One of the questions I've been asked, is what on EARTH made you decide to do this?

I think I mentioned this a couple of months ago, but I learned this fall that I have a congenital heart condition. It's called a bicuspid aortic valve, and is complicated by an enlarged aorta. What this means is that my valve between my heart & my aorta has two of its little leaflets stuck together, and so it does not work as efficiently as one with the normal three leaflets. My body, amazing machine that it is, has made my aorta bigger in order to compensate.

In my head, I know that what my cardiologist tells me is that this is not that big of a deal. After all, if this is congenital, I've had it all of my life. I walked 60 miles in 3 days with this heart. I gave birth naturally with this heart. It's been doing its job for the last 35.5 years, and will likely keep doing said job for the next 40.

Emotionally, it's not so simple. I was 34 years old, and have a cardiologist. Since when your aorta decides to stretch out a little, just like a balloon that is blown up, it's not as strong, my doc told me that the only restriction is that I shouldn't lift more than 40 lbs. This week my baby turns 6. With the growth spurt he's been on, I'd say he's got to be at least 48 lbs. He's asking me not to lift my child.

But there is NOTHING that I can do. Other than avoiding stress (I LIVE on stress- it's my happy place) and not picking up my baby (like THAT is going to happen) I'm just supposed to get an echo cardiogram once a year to see if any thing's changing.

I'm not someone who deals well with things being out of my control. But my weight has gone up, and I have been having a hard time making it stop. As I may have mentioned... I don't so much enjoy exercise. AT ALL. But once I make a decision to do something, I'm going to do it. I'm a hard worker, but I need a goal, a light at the end of the tunnel.

So that is why, this weekend, I should have been doing a triathlon. To be honest, I was really glad to have some time off, and get to rest and relax with my boys. But after slacking all week, I need to kick it back into gear.

Tonight I swam, tomorrow night I will wun, and Wednesday... well, that's my baby's special day, so we will see.

Working for the Weekend

Had a good workout tonight- it was a warm night and there were a LOT more people out at Seward Park. Are you people really Northwesteners? We don't let a little rain (last week) get in the way of a swim... you're going to be jumping in the WATER for goodness sake!

Anyhow- I need to start pushing myself a little harder, but that's something I know, not feel as the race is still 11 wks away. Our coach asked if I'm doing another event- that's not currently the plan, but I'm considering one in August in Wenatchee. My biggest worry there is that there will be a) men, and b) a lot of people who take this WAY more seriously than I do. I mean, I'm serious, but I'm serious about getting to the end, not about beating anyone, you know?

So some kind of random musings tonight, and then I won't post for a couple of days since my hubby & I are going out of town for a belated anniv present to each other (yes, any time I've been frustrated this week, I'm thinking Seaweed/Coffee wrap, Massage, Facial over & over & over) but I've got thinks that I've thunk.

Tonight was a swim- 1/4 or 1/2 mile (the 1/4 was for us poky girls) and then 30 min wun. This is where I should be pushing myself, but I'm working with goals like, not panicking, and not rolling onto my back like a bloated turtle when said panic happens. Tonight- goal reached- no rolling on back. Should have been swimming faster, but I also need to remember that my goals are just as valid as the girls who were way the heck ahead.

Same with wunning. Wunning is OK. I ended up chatting and not pushing myself as hard as I could, so there was way more walk than anything else, BUT I noticed when I went for a walk w/ a friend to grab lunch at work- I didn't get as winded coming back up the hill. Small steps.

My final story is from last Sat, but I totally forgot to share it last blog. The 2nd time I did my mini-tri, I only had one moment of panic. I saw a white thing moving under the water out of the corner of my eye and thought "WHAT THE F WAS THAT? IS IT SOME DEAD THING?" I went with the Dory philosophy (from Finding Nemo for those of you w/ out kids) "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming" and figured out a few strokes later what it was that I saw. IT WAS MY OWN PALE ARM! So then I had to try not to choke on water laughing at myself in the middle of a lake, realizing I just freaked out seeing my own appendage out of the corner of my eye. I'm such a dork. But at least I accept & can laugh at my dorkiness. :)